Crossroads

Day 25

I've heard all about this crossroads thingy, quite frankly I've never particularly believe it existed.  I've always thought it was  just an excuse to end a marriage or perhaps an excuse not finish a project or even leave a job you just don't want to do  (and there is nothing wrong with any of those things if your life is at a standstill and you are struggling to find something you can be passionate about) .  But the truth is I'm starting to think there may actually be something to this.  I feel like I'm at a bit of a crossroad in my life right now.

I feel I'm at a point in my life where things I thought I wanted I'm no longer as passionate about and things I never thought I would have the confidence to pursue I want to dive in head first at (I mean really, I couldn't possibly end up any more injured than what I already am. Right?

My plans for the most part are still the same (with very slight time adjustments because of the accident setting me back slightly).  I will finish all my studies that I am booked in for by the end of 2018. 

I will finish my Certificate IV in Weight Management and become an Accredited Weight Management Practitioner by the end of 2018.  I will also complete my Level 2 intermediate Run Coach by the end of this month.

What's different is what I plan on doing with the accreditations.  I had always thought it was to help me with my general knowledge and I may somewhere down the track use my knowledge in a general way in my own life.  That is not how I feel about it all now.  Its not about money, see for me that has never been a driving factor (despite needing it and it coming in handy with 3 children) its the thought that I can use all this to help other people.  Even typing about it now I have tingles going down my spine. I want to help as many people as I can and change their lives so they are able to live healthier, happier lives because of what I have to pass on.

I don't want to overcomplicate it with a lot of fancy scientific wording, hell I'd never heard of quinoa 18 months ago and could never pronounce it properly.  I still struggle with some of the herbs and grains.  I want to keep it real remembering the place where i started and that feeling of being extremely vunerable. To be able to write up meal plans for people who don't have basic nutrition knowledge and to be able to incorporate a written walk/run cardio plan so that the cost for the client is kept to minimum makes me excited about life again.

The thought of being qualified and insured to coach both adults but also children in the basic fundamentals of running right through to writing up a marathon training plan makes me smile.  To be able to run clinics to give people the opportunity to experience something they otherwise may not and lets not forget the sense of community running brings.  In my experience it has a level of companionship and comradery I haven't seen in another sport.

The ironman is probably the most important aspect of my recovery (my therapist would probably disagree) but each day even now (its 3.14am) I cant wait to start writing.  I watch the clock sometimes waiting for it to be 24hours so I can make a new entry without bugging my readers too much with overkill.

I just love to write and exercise.  Two things that keep me well and passionate about living.  With the ironman, I can incorporate all the things I really enjoy, while still being able to pursue my weight management consultancy business and also conduct some running sessions and even write up some training programs for clients with future runs in their sights.

Finding my love for writing again, combine with that fire in my belly to complete a half ironman in 2018 will no doubt bring me my fair share of obstacles and I myself, am still in the process of healing from CPTSD, but i do believe that all this will help me to push for changes within the Mental Health Care System, the Hospital system and Medicare itself because all are clearly broken just like me, but like anything that's broken, it has the capacity to heal itself given the right path to go on.

I believe I have the knowledge and the voice to push for some much needed changes.  I believe that these are all significant goals but also achievable.

On a side note, I shed some tears yesterday (ok a lot) I was informed (I wasn't aware i had been nominated) that I had received a number of votes and ultimately won a Tailwind Nutrition Australia Community Spirit Award.  The write up stated i won it for quote 'her amazing strength after her accident, sharing her story, remaining incredibly positive continuing to volunteer and for dealing with the incident with a wicked sense of humor'.

Let me just say the other nominees were truly incredible people and I am just so honored to have been nominated along side them.

I need some rest before i tackle breakfast and a morning walk.

Donna xo