Today’s been one of those days, you know what I mean where you question everything and I can’t help but wonder why I’m still here, broken friendships that were once very strong and seemed unbreakable, you deal with the PTSD from the minute you get out of bed those horrible shakes, you pick yourself up and keep going, looking for all the positives there are so many, I graduated last week  and am now a Weight Management Practitioner, I’m following my dream to teach people to run, I’m loosing weight & gaining some strength back.

But it’s hard work getting back, then a friend messaged me to ask how my bike ride went, to which I replied, it didn’t happen, I couldn’t shift the feelings that were bedded in me from when I woke.  She sent me the most wonderful message and it reminded me why I keep going.  Friendships come in all forms and when you need someone they seem to just appear.  Thank you Alison for caring and understanding, sometimes a simple message can change everything.

I feel motivated to get back out there and do my best to give back what I believe I’m meant to do.  My passion for running is stronger than ever and although I can’t do it right now there are so many things I can do, teach other people the joys of running, focus my energy into those that may have been just like me, looking for that little something to get started.

I would really like to say a massive thank you to the run like a girl community who were an amazing support over the last couple of weeks, you guys are awesome. I do believe I have a lot to give and need to except the bad days, they happen for all of us just in different forms.

Once running again I plan to work harder than I ever have and I’ve learnt to love swimming, the bike will happen, I have so much to be thankful for.  A few (17 exactly) should mean extra motivation to get out there and change my life, not worry about friendships they will happen if they are meant to be, perhaps I’ve forced too many without even realising.

Next week back to strength work & rehab with my swimming & cycling.  I can get there I know I can I realtor don’t think it was a permanent thing.